Mentally Flossed

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This is the woman who gave birth to me, who, according to anyone I’ve asked, loved and spoiled me. And then she was gone, out of my life, when I was four. Except for a brief moment later when the very angry ten year old me yelled at her, told her I never wanted to see her again. She took those words, those very hurt and angry words of a child who didn’t know any better, to heart and disappeared again. Every year, as Mother’s Day approaches, I think about her. In the beginning, it was always in anger, that whole “how *dare* you leave me behind?” whirlwind of fiery angst. But as I grew up, it changed into sadness over one more person who was supposed to be there for me and wasn’t. That sadness has since changed into an odd wondering. Was she thinking of me today? Did she ever wonder if I was a mother now, too? Did she have grandkids she didn’t know about? Do I have siblings I don’t know about? Nieces and nephews? The list goes on and on.Part of me wants to find her, a part that grows bigger every year, but part of me doesn’t.  I admit I’m scared to find out that she had another daughter that got to keep her. I don’t know what I would do. So instead, I just ponder her existence and wish her happiness and love, even if that means I’m not a part of it.

This is the woman who gave birth to me, who, according to anyone I’ve asked, loved and spoiled me. And then she was gone, out of my life, when I was four.

Except for a brief moment later when the very angry ten year old me yelled at her, told her I never wanted to see her again. She took those words, those very hurt and angry words of a child who didn’t know any better, to heart and disappeared again.

Every year, as Mother’s Day approaches, I think about her. In the beginning, it was always in anger, that whole “how *dare* you leave me behind?” whirlwind of fiery angst. But as I grew up, it changed into sadness over one more person who was supposed to be there for me and wasn’t.

That sadness has since changed into an odd wondering. Was she thinking of me today? Did she ever wonder if I was a mother now, too? Did she have grandkids she didn’t know about? Do I have siblings I don’t know about? Nieces and nephews? The list goes on and on.

Part of me wants to find her, a part that grows bigger every year, but part of me doesn’t.  I admit I’m scared to find out that she had another daughter that got to keep her. I don’t know what I would do.

So instead, I just ponder her existence and wish her happiness and love, even if that means I’m not a part of it.

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Start 2012 with Some Passion!

Hi! I’m coming to you today as Connie the Passion Diva!

Today is our big Booking Blizzard, and I’m trying to book as many parties as I can for 2012. My goal is 20 parties, and I currently have 3 booked!  

All I ask is that you consider hosting for me this year.  Doesn’t have to be soon, and I’ll call to remind you about it later, as we get closer.  The most ideal dates are January for the Valentine’s Day specials, June-August for the summer specials, and October-December for winter/holiday specials.  March is also really good, because most folks have filed and received their tax returns!

WHAT’S IN IT FOR YOU?

Other than the opportunity to spend time with me? ;-)  

No, seriously, there is a special hostess gift available for every party booked today (you can see it on the flyer on my FB page http://www.facebook.com/PassionKyst for more information). Also, if you book a party with me before 1 April, you also get the fabulous Ducky Love just for having me in your home!  That’s two free gifts just for starters! Doesn’t even touch what you can get with all the retail sales!

ADD A MINI-BOUDOIR SESSION!

If you’re local, you have the option to add a mini-boudoir session with your party with our local photography studio, Restless Wings Photography.  You can check out some of their boudoir work on their Smolder Photography page (https://www.facebook.com/SmolderPhotography).  These girls are amazing! Please read below for more information:

1. There is now a $25/hr rental fee that is payable by you.

2. This fee will be returned to you when at least TWO of your guests purchase mini-sessions for $20, which includes a 15-20 minute session and 4 edited photos (to be reviewed at a later date). There will be a pre-paid option available, and I’ll give you details once it’s ready.

Should your guests wish to purchase prints, they can do so at their viewing. Once their viewing is done, their photos will be made available on FB to be used as profile pictures.

3. Also there is a $20 purchase requirement from me, if you want to participate. I will have a special running. If you agree to get photos done and let me know in advance, I’ll have your product in hand, so you’ll go home all revved up and ready to go! [;-)]

(I know it seems like a lot, but I promise it’s worth it. Every penny.)

IF YOU’RE OUT OF TOWN

Consider having a catalog party for me! We’ll pick a week, and I’ll send you a party packet, which will include:

1 - hostess packet
5 - toy catalogs
5 - bath & body catalog
5 - seasonal special catalogs
10 - order forms

And for $20, I’ll include a set of samples of some of my favorite lubes, edibles and lotions for you and your guests to try out.

ALSO, I’m more than happy to do my entire demo via webcam! That lets you and your guests see the products better and ask questions!  We can do that on the last day of your week, so we can close out your party.  All orders will have to be paid through me.

IF YOU’RE LOCAL

You can also do a catalog party!  I’ll get you the same packet, and I’ll meet up with you at the end of the week to pick up any orders that may be available!

So if you’re interested in helping me make this goal today, please contact me before midnight tonight!  

Thank you!

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Visitor (a Poem)

I found this while wandering through my Xanga archives.  I’d forgotten I’d written a poem about my ability to see ghosts.  Enjoy.

A man stands before me,
so quiet that I almost don’t see him
as he leans against the wall,
eyes all for me.

It takes a moment to process
the thin, filmy edges of his outline,
how patient he is, waiting,
as if to see if I can see.

Because they like to test me,
my name floating in their ether
like a ghostly urban legend
of my different vision.

I walk towards him slowly,
well-aware that he could disappear
just as suddenly as he’d come,
and he pushes off the wall.

A small smile curves his pale lips,
withheld anticipation apparent
as he smoothes his hands o’er his pants,
still silent, but very much aware.

His mouth moves, words unspoken,
but I am unafraid, his energy warm,
his spark still bright with his former life,
his soul is good.

“I can see you,” I whisper,
my hands trembling slightly;
the experience never gets old for me,
this ever delicate interaction.

“I heard you could,” he replies,
shrugging, like it didn’t matter,
when we both know full well it does.
“I just had to see for myself.”

He tips an invisible hat my way,
gone with one blink of my eyes,
and I half wonder if I imagined him
before he pops back into view and winks.

I shake my head with a huge grin,
ever amazed that they find me the oddity,
when the truth of the matter is simple:
Without them, I wouldn’t be so special.
©Daeshii, 4/26/07

Filed under ghosts poetry

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Yule is Coming!

I’m Wiccan, yes, and I love the joy that is Christmas.

That childlike naivete of wonder and goodness. 

The love of family and friends.

I realize for Christians, there’s a more spiritual reason for the season, and I respect that. (And I will refrain from my normal rant about why you celebrate His birth in December, bc that’s so not the point!)

But there is a more spiritual reason for us pagans, too, something magickal within the beauty of our place of worship. 

Be it cactus and desert,
or fir trees and snow,
mountains,
smoke from well-kept fires,

we too touch base with this holy of times.

And it’s because of this that I do not feel the need to get upset when someone says “Merry Christmas” to me instead of “Merry Yule” (aside from the fact that unless they’re also a pagan, they wouldn’t even know to say those words to me!). 

“Happy Holidays!”

“Happy Channukah!”

“Bah Humbug!”

Here’s the thing.  Your intent is good, genuine, sincere (unless you’re working at a big box retail store after a 12 hour shift!), and I’m thankful that you want to share that with me.   (Just like I don’t mind if you pray for me, but that’s a whole other ball of wax…)

(On another interesting note, I will not say “Merry Yule” unless I know you’re pagan. Not bc I’m afraid of a beatdown or a lecture about accepting Jesus into my heart, but bc I’m too damn lazy to have to explain it to everyone else in casual conversation.  So I tend to reply in kind or say, “Hope you have a great holiday season!)

And I invite you to share my perspective.  Just try it, and point all that energy you’re using to be irritated over other people who are just trying to share their bliss with you toward love and joy with your family and friends.  World’s a better place when you do!

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Why YOU Should Be a Passion Diva on Team Cyberkyst

WHY NOW?

One more week remaining in our consultant drive. Don’t get me wrong. We’re always recruiting, but for 7 more days, you can get into the Passion Party business for a start-up of $29 (plus tax/shipping).

What does that get you?

  • The Passion Parties Guide to Great Sex
  • Let’s Play Catalogs (25)
  • Love is in the Air Catalogs (25)
  • Hostess Rewards Brochures (25)
  • Consultant Handbook
  • Party Planner (May 2011-June 2012)
  • Customer Order Forms (50)
  • You Can Have It All Sponsoring Brochures (25)
  • Passion Parties Consultant Training Library

Also you have the opportunity to place your Qualifying Consultant Order ($250 in retail of product of your choice!) at the time of sign-up for no additional shipping cost. BIG SAVINGS!!

That means you can choose what you want for your kit, if you want a kit at all.

WHY PASSION PARTIES?

I’d been wanting to get into this business for the longest time. Just ask any of my friends.  However, I couldn’t find a good match with any of the companies I knew about!  Then someone introduced me to Passion Parties!

What I really love:

Technology!

  • Our ordering system is online. No mailing things in, or handing them off at weekly meetings.
  • Our training is both online and via phone conferences you can dial into from the comfort of your own home!
  • Every level of our upline is on Facebook! 
  • You can have a shoppable storefront or just an online presence, too!

Flexibility!

  • While, yes, there is a mandatory goal of $250 in retail sales to become a Qualified Consultant, and a requirement to sell $600 worth of product in six months to maintain your QC status, everything else is up to you!
  • Work when you want to.  The hours you want. The weekends you want. The times you want. Yes, you should be a little flexible for your hostesses, but don’t give up your date night with your significant other, bc that’s the only night she wants to do it!

Product, product, product!

  • One of the largest selections of adult toys from educational health (like our Kegel Pods) to couple’s fun (We-Vibe II) to  a great selection of vibrators
  • Huge line of bath and body products

WHY ME?

Education!

Who’s playing teacher now? You are!

There are too many women out there who are in the dark about women’s health and sexuality.  Whether it’s a conservative upbringing or a fear about being thought of as one of those women, these women are looking for answers and the atmosphere of a Passion Party gives them an opportunity to ask without feeling self-conscious.

Fun!

Every party isn’t just a party for your hostess! What other job changes with every venue, even with the same presentation? What other job brings out the best in women in a spirit of education and naughty fun? What other job gives you the satisfaction, when asked what you do, of saying, “I do those parties” with a naughty wink?

WHAT ARE THE PERKS?

There are a ton of perks with Passion Parties. Invest enough time and energy and you could be one of our consultants who gets a new car! In the beginning, there are perks, too!

  • 40% commission from the get go
  • Your purchases for your kit, minus sales aids, count toward your monthly sales. So that’s an automatic bump every time we get new stuff added to our line!
  • Sell $1,000 retail in your first month and get a $50 credit applied to your account.
  • Sell $1,000 retail in your second month and get a free We-Vibe II ($130) value.
  • Recruit your own team (two qualified divas) in your third month and get an adorable pink toy box and black portfolio.
  • Sell $250 a month and be eligible for special savings on the Product of the Month!
  • Our annual conference is in Vegas! And all annual sales can earn you points to spend on conference-only stuff!
  • And there’s so much more!!

SO TELL ME WHAT ELSE I NEED TO TELL YOU TO GET YOU ONBOARD?

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    Love Letters (a poem)

    dedicated to my wonderful husband…I <3 you.

    There’s something about putting pen to paper,
    a sense of permanence, perhaps,
    as if a subtle swirl of ink
    somehow spills the pulse of my heart
    across the vast universe of Love
    to lay content against the curve of yours.
    6 September 2011

    Filed under love poetry